Nollywood actress Obey Etok-Chima, who lost her husband and father in the same year, has said she is not giving up on her acting career despite the odds.
In an emotional chat, the actress spoke about grief, loneliness, relevance in Nollywood, and why she remains unshaken after two decades in the industry.
Losing your husband and father in the same year must have been devastating. How have you been coping?
It hasn’t been easy. It’s something you can’t easily get over. If not for movies, I don’t know how I would have coped. Except when I’m on a movie set, where a lot of things occupy my mind: my acting, costume and getting into the character. Aside that, when I’m alone, I’m always remembering them.
Birthdays have been the hardest. My children just celebrated — first son marked his birthday on May 12, last child in June, second daughter in July, first daughter on July 23. I also turned 50 on June 30. My late husband doesn’t play with his children’s birthdays. So since his demise, I have been marking their birthdays all alone, and it’s not been easy. When I look at my children, especially the one that looks like my husband, I’m always like, okay, this is what your Dad would have done.
After two decades in Nollywood, what has kept you going?
First, it’s by God’s grace and secondly, when you know what you’re doing, you will always excel despite the challenges. I started acting in primary school.
Definitely, acting is my path. I’m not crashing. I’m just doing what God ordained for me to do. When God has crowned you and said this is where you should be, nothing is going to block you.
Most of the jobs I get, it’s the crew members that usually direct producers and directors to invite me to set. If I was a proud person, nobody would want to recommend me. My calling is to make people happy. I love people a lot and that has been one of my staying power.
You have played diverse roles. Do you have a preference?
I do everything. I don’t want to be stagnated to one particular role. If you watch ‘The Yard’ on Africa Magic which I featured in last year, you would see that this woman can interpret any kind of role.
I just wrapped a comedy for Nosa Rex and tragedy is my strength too. When it comes to shedding tears, give it to Obey. It’s something that God has deposited in me.
What would you say is the biggest challenge in Nollywood today?
The industry is about belonging to a clique. Before now, there was nothing like cliques, but today, there are. For me, I’m not in a clique of anybody. So anywhere I go, anywhere they call me, I’m there.
What has been your biggest turning point?
My biggest turning point was landing Africa Magic jobs. ‘The Yard’ last year was a very great and challenging role for me.
Without YouTube, it was like Nollywood was gone. That’s where we eat from. So Netflix is one particular platform I would love to work with. I’ve been praying for it. I’ve been praying for cinema jobs.
As a single mother and actress, how do you protect your peace?
I don’t get pressurized. I cut my coat according to my size. I’m not a materialistic person. I don’t let anything enter my head because all these things, like I always say, they are all vanity.
How do you handle male attention?
If you’re good looking, men will come for you. So you can’t stop it. People will tell you, you are beautiful. It’s something I should be thanking God for.
You are also known as a football fan…
I am a proud Messian. Messi is complete football. I love him. If Messi had only one fan, I am that person. If the world is against him, then I am against the world. Messi for life.
At 50, Obey Etok-Chima says she is focused on her craft, her children, and honouring her loved ones — one role at a time.
